


#20 All I Need

by gpadow



Category: Gunsmoke, Matt/Kitty
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-20
Updated: 2011-09-20
Packaged: 2017-10-23 21:54:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/255421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gpadow/pseuds/gpadow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>M&K become God Parents</p>
            </blockquote>





	#20 All I Need

**Author's Note:**

> This story respectfully features characters and canon from the television series, Gunsmoke, which aired in 1955. They do not belong to me.

#20 All I Need

Apr. 19th, 2010 at 8:20 AM

 

Reveling in the hot, scented bath, Kitty closed her eyes and smiled as Matt's large, strong hands gently covered her arms and shoulders in the soft lather of soap and oil.

They were only slightly aware of the remote, faint sounds below.

"Tell me again what this Godparent thing is all about, Kitty."  
"Lanie and Dave honored us by asking us to participate in the twins' baptism. You should feel proud, Matt."

"Sure. I understand her wanting you for the job, Kitty. She used to follow you around like a frightened puppy. But Reverend Simon said we had to hold the babies and say a prayer and promise to.."  
Kitty interrupted him with her laughter. "I'm the one who should be nervous, Cowboy. Church. The ceiling will probably fall down on my head."

Matt leaned over to kiss the tip of her nose.

"Where are you going?" the redhead asked as the big man stood to leave.

"You asked me pick something up, remember?  
Christening gifts, whatever that means."

"Mr. Jonas will have them ready. Wait 'til you see them, Matt. Beautiful christening gowns and bonnets and bracelets."

"Bracelets for babies?"

"They're silver with pearls and are engraved with their names from their Aunt Kitty and Uncle Matt.  
I know Lanie will love them," Kitty said in a dreamy voice.

Matt was already through the next room putting on his gun belt and Stetson. "I'll be back soon," he said as he walked through the door.

###

"Doing some pretty fancy shopping, I see. Peace officers must do very well indeed." Doc Adams rubbed a hand over his mustache and winked at Wilbur Jonas.

"I'm just picking these up for Kitty. They're for the Davidson twins."

"By golly, that's right. You two are going to be the Godparents, aren't you?"

"They sure are beautiful babies," Jonas smiled. "Big, too! And Lanie being such a tiny thing."

"It was a rough delivery all right. Kitty and I were with her all night. And poor ol' Dave was beside himself."  
Doc had to smile at the memory of bringing the baby boy and girl into the world.  
"I'll walk over to the Long Branch with you, Matt."

"Actually, Doc, could you do me a favor and bring these things to Kitty?  
I have to go to the office," Matt said has he placed the packages in Doc's arms, and then turned to walk down the boardwalk.

Doc crossed Front Street on his way to the Long Branch. When he reached the boardwalk, he looked back across the street to see Matt Dillon entering Mr. Jonas' store. He must have forgotten something, the old friend thought.

###

"I'll be right there, Doc."  
Kitty's voice came from the next room. Doc realized she was changing clothes and didn't want to take a seat, so he replied "No rush, Kitty. I'll wait for you downstairs."

"All done," Kitty said as she emerged, giving a toss of her head that sent shiny red hair flying behind her like the mane of a horse.

"Have a seat, Curly."  
The refreshed lady was clearly in a cheerful mood as she handed her old friend a glass of whiskey, and then took a sip of her own before concentrating on the packages Doc had placed on the big oak table.

"Matt said these are for the twins, Kitty."

"Yes. Wait 'til you see what I found, Doc. I told Lanie the Godparents will be proud to give the christening gowns. They came just in time!"

Doc watched his favorite lady hold up a tiny, white gown and admire the lovely lace work.

"What does Matt think about this Godfather business, Kitty?"

"Oh, you know how he is, Doc. Matt will be okay on Sunday but he's a little uncomfortable thinking about it now."

Kitty sat down next to her friend and took another sip of her drink.

"David and Elaine Davidson and their son and daughter David Junior and Marie Kathleen, Kitty said proudly.  
Who would have thought that little waif of a girl would be a wife and mother and living in a nice little ranch, just happy as can be, Doc."

"By thunder, I remember when you took her in, Kitty. The Long Branch terrified her."  
Doc pulled a hand over his mustache and smiled at the memory of Lanie Poke, a hillgirl Matt brought into Dodge after he rescued her from two abusive brothers.

"Well, I better finish getting ready for work, Curly."

Kitty stood, and Doc downed the rest of his drink before walking to the door. "Um, I see you keep the good stuff for personal use."

"Of course!" Kitty laughed.

###

The Friday crowd in the Long Branch was thinning out as Kitty left the bar to Sam, and brought a bottle and three glasses to the table where Doc and Matt were talking over beer. The men stood as Matt held out a chair for her.

"Sure feels good to sit down," the saloon owner said as she poured their whiskey.

"Matt, did you know that Kitty keeps a special stock up in her room while she pushes this stuff on unsuspecting customers?"

"By golly, I didn't know that, Doc. Don't you like us, Miss Kitty?"

"Okay you two, that's enough silliness. You know I always serve you the better whiskey, and how often do you actually pay for it?"

"I've been meaning to ask you, Matt, what it was you went back to buy earlier," Doc said, changing the subject.

Kitty looked at Matt and he blushed a little.

"Oh, just a little something I, uh, well it just kinda caught my eye."

"What did?" Doc asked, clearly enjoying himself.

"Well, I just thought with the christening and all," Matt mumbled. "You know."

Both Doc and Kitty stared at the big lawman as he fumbled with the inside pocket of his vest. He finally retrieved something and held it out to Kitty.  
"It's just a little something I thought you'd like, Kitty. I mean, I know you like the one with our pictures in it, so I thought you could put pictures of the twins in this one."

Kitty took the small package from his hand while looking into his eyes. She smiled and began to carefully unwrap it.  
Matt was aware that Doc shot him a look when he mentioned "our pictures", and waited for the old physician to make a remark.  
Doc just pulled his hand over his mustache and said, "Let's see what you have there, Kitty."

"Oh Matt, it's lovely," Kitty said softly as she opened the locket and seemed to caress it while turning her face to Matt. They held each other in a long gaze and then Kitty smiled and whispered, "I love it."

"That is mighty nice all right, Doc said. I'd like to see the one with your photographs in it," he added with a grin.

Matt gave him a frown as Kitty laughed.

"Matthew!" Festus called out to the accompaniment of his jiggling spurs.

"What in tarnation has got you so all-fired.."

"Oh hush up, Doc. Beggin' yer pardon, Miz Kitty."

"What is it, Festus?" Matt asked.

"There's trouble out at the Flack place again, Matthew. Old Jedro come ridin' in all bloodied up and saying we need to get out there right away."

The hillman turned his attention to Doc saying, "You best be getting up ta your office, Doc. Jedro is headed there and he's gonna need your attention."

As Doc and Matt rose from their seats, Kitty looked up at Matt and said, "Sunday."

"Don't worry, Kitty. I'll be back tomorrow night."

 

###

Winding her way through the Saturday night crowd, Kitty looked toward the batwing doors. Again, no sign of him.

A few hours later, Sam was sweeping up as thick smoke floated on the humid air. Kitty emerged from her office and then walked out onto the boardwalk. The redhead took a deep breath while rubbing the back of her neck as she searched up and down Front Street. No lights at the office and jail, no sign of life at the stables, no familiar sound of boots walking toward her. Nothing.

"Anything I can get for you, Miss Kitty?"

"No thanks, Sam. You can lock up any time."

The loyal bartender watched his boss-lady slowly climb the stairs to her rooms above the Long Branch Saloon. He said a little prayer to bring their Marshal safely home to her soon.

###

Sunday morning.  
Usually her favorite time. Dodge City was quiet and Festus had taken the routine of doing the morning rounds. Her man wouldn't be leaving before dawn and they could be together, bathed in sunlight and pleasure.  
But not all Sundays.  
And not this special Sunday.  
Promises.

###

Doc's buggy pulled up in front of the little chapel to the sound of a crying baby, as the Davidson family waited inside.

Rev. Simon came out to greet them as Doc helped Kitty down, and then retrieved the white box with intertwined pink and blue bows.

"Good morning, Miss Russell, Doctor Adams.  
"What a glorious day the Lord has given us!  
If you'll just step inside.." the Reverend stopped to look around.  
"Has the Marshal been delayed?"

Kitty stepped inside without a word, leaving Doc to explain.

###

A bruised and battered Matt Dillon pulled up his horse as he turned to his deputy. Festus Haggen's left eye looked wider than ever, as his usually squinted right one was swollen closed. The hillman also had a bandanna tied around his head, just visible under his hat.

"Festus, I don't know if I can make it in time, but I've just got to try. Do you think you can manage to get these men the rest of the way to Dodge alone?"

"Why, 'course I can, Matthew. Don't ya be frettin none about these here yea-hoos a'tall."

Without another word, the lawman spurred Buck and then headed past Boot Hill, straight toward the little chapel in Dodge City, as hymns could be heard drifting through the empty streets.

Kitty discreetly turned her head toward the door at the back of the chapel as she held the baby boy, who contentedly sucked the tip of her little finger. The nervous father held the restless baby girl, who let out a wail while the proud mother blushed and smiled.

"..that baptism signifies the faithfulness of God, the washing away of sin, rebirth, putting on the fresh garment of Christ, being sealed by God's Spirit, adoption into the covenant of the Church, resurrection and illumination in Christ.."

Kitty once again looked to the door, and then sighed. She smiled down at the infant in her arms.

Matt Dillon almost flew off Buck as he brought the racing horse to a stop. The big man ran to the door, almost bursting into the chapel, when he suddenly stopped to unbuckle his gun belt. He bolted back to his tired horse to hook the gun belt over the saddle horn before taking a deep breath and saying to himself, "I'm a mess."

"..the water that is used symbolizes three accounts from the Old Testament: the waters of creation, the flood described in the story of Noah, and the Hebrews' escape from Egypt across the Red Sea.."

Matt stood frozen for a moment with his left hand on the door. That's when he noticed his arm, and quickly began brushing off dried mud and blood from his sleeves, vest and shirtfront.

"..Bible declares God claimed humanity as his own before the foundation of the world. Please turn in your Good Book to Ephesians 1:4.."

The preacher was interrupted by gasps from the congregation as they turned to find a disheveled Matt Dillon standing, hat in hand, in the center of the aisle.  
Kitty stared wide-eyed at him. Matt's left sleeve was cut off at the elbow and his forearm was wrapped in a bandage. His hair was matted down with dried mud.  
Kitty smiled at the shy man, but she really wanted to rush down the aisle to plant a big kiss on his lips.

"Excuse me for being late, folks," Matt said as he looked at Kitty, and then put his head down to add, "I just, well, I should have gotten cleaned up but I was afraid I'd be too late, and, well, I .."

All at once Doc was at his side, taking the Stetson from his hands, and giving him a push toward the altar.

Matt reached the group and then looked at the preacher, mouthing, "Sorry, Reverend."

Elaine Davidson spoke up first. "Dave honey, let the Marshal hold Marie."

The concerned father looked at the wriggling, whining infant ,and then at the big man covered in trail dust with cuts and bruises on his swollen face.

Suddenly, Rev. Simon took baby Marie and placed her in Matt's arms.  
"Praise the Lord!"

 

###

Matt stood next to Kitty as she proudly held Davy, while the ladies of the congregation set out their covered dish meal in the fellowship hall while the men talked in small groups.  
Most of the women came over to coo at the round-cheeked baby, but some stayed back and whispered amongst themselves.  
"How can the reverend allow such a thing.." "Well, I never.." "A woman like that.."

Dave and Lanie came over smiling like two lovesick kids. The proud new papa handed his crying baby daughter to Matt and said, "Marshal, she only seems to be good when you hold her."

Matt's huge hands gently took Marie. He tucked the light blanket around her kicking legs beneath the long, white christening gown and said, "Look at those fists, Dave. You've got yourself a handful with this one.

I'm surprised she doesn't have red hair," Matt grinned, as he walked toward the curtains that led back to the chapel.

Lanie took her son from Kitty and handed him to her husband, planting a kiss on his cheek. She linked her arm through Kitty's and the two women walked over to the curtained doorway to stand next to Matt.

"My son seems to love his Aunt Kitty, Lanie said. Did you ever wonder what it would like to have one of your own?"

Matt looked at Kitty, The redhead nodded up at him with a grin, and said, "You, twice over."

The three laughed, and so did baby Marie, which made them laugh even more.

###

Rev. Simon stood outside the door as parishioners filed past, shaking his hand. Youngsters playing in the yard were called to join their parents as they climbed aboard their wagons.

The smiling preacher held his newest baptized boy while talking to the proud parents. Kitty wandered away from the group, and then back to the front of the chapel. Seated in the first pew, Matt Dillon held the child who seemed peaceful only in his arms. Kitty stood a few rows back, watching.

"..and if your brother makes you mad or you feel sad about something, just come to Uncle Matt."

He brushed a little kiss on her forehead, and softly hummed a lullaby, while gently rocking the infant back and forth.

Kitty's heart was full as she watched this man who had spent the past few days risking life and limb for the badge, tenderly care for his Godchild.

"You're such a special girl, you know that? You weren't the least bit afraid of me, were you? Not you.

All the big kids looked at me like I was some kind of monster, covered in all these cuts and bruises. But not my special girl."

I think you're going to be as brave and as beautiful as your Aunt Kitty.  
Well, almost."

Kitty wiped a tear from her cheek and smiled at the beautiful scene.

"Your papa is so lucky," Matt whispered.

A sudden chill came over Kitty and she gave a little gasp.

Dave Davidson came up to Kitty and said, "We just can't thank you enough for sharing this special day with us."

"Marshal, I never asked about what happened, but I'm sure glad you're okay. You and Miss Kitty must come to dinner sometime soon."

"Sure thing, Dave," Matt said as he gently handed the sleeping child to her father. I just told this little angel that her papa is a mighty lucky man."

Lanie gave Kitty a big hug, and then took her infant son from Rev. Simon as they walked down the aisle, with Matt and Kitty following close behind.

Matt noticed his hat on a hook by the door and realized Doc had left in his buggy.  
Well, they could walk back, or he could lead Buck while Kitty rode, or..

The lawman put on his gun belt as Rev. Simon waved goodbye to the Davidson family, and then returned to the chapel.

Kitty stood by Matt and patted the nose of the big buckskin. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Well, now we have a real good excuse to put our arms around each other in public, Cowboy."

###

At a table in back of the Long Branch, Doc was delighting in telling Festus about the twins' christening and Matt's grand entrance.

Sam was placing a fresh platter of cold cuts at the end of the bar and Kitty suddenly realized that she was very hungry. She was so busy fussing over the babies that she never sampled any of the food. Not that the "proper" ladies of Dodge made her feel welcome to do so.  
Rev. Simon certainly was kind to them. Not all of her experiences with clergy have been as pleasant. I'll have to send a donation to the building fund, she thought.

"Looks like Doc and Festus are ready for another beer, Miss Kitty."

"What? Oh, sure Sam. It's okay to send one over."

"Are you all right, Miss Kitty? You seem like there's something troubling you. You've been distracted all night."

"I'm just a little tired, Sam.  
Kitty smiled as she placed a hand on her friend's arm.  
And hungry. I'm going to fix myself a plate and go back to the office for a while."

Sam took a fresh beer to Doc and Festus and said, "Compliments of Miss Kitty."

"Where is your lovely boss, Sam? Doc asked. I haven't seen her since the church service."

"She's been keeping to herself, Doc. I think there's something on her mind, but she said she's just tired."

Sam went back behind the bar, and his frowning look of concern turned to a smile as Matt Dillon entered the saloon.

"Well, by thunder, you clean up pretty well, Marshal Dillon," Doc said as Matt walked up.

"Evening Doc, Festus."  
Matt smiled at his friends and looked around, and then walked up to the bar.

"What'll it be Marshal?"

Before Matt could ask, Sam said, "Miss Kitty is in her office. I don't think she's feeling too good, Marshal."

"Thanks, Sam," Matt replied, as he headed through the back door that led to the hall and office.

Just as he was about to knock, Matt heard a low sobbing sound. He slowly opened the door and saw Kitty sitting at her desk with her head down, crying.

"Kitty?"

The redhead quickly turned away from him.

"What's wrong, Kitty? Sam said you weren't feeling well."

"I'm fine. Just tired.  
Why don't you grab a drink and join Doc and Festus. I'll be out in a minute."

Matt knew he was being dismissed, but he wanted to comfort her.  
"Kitty, are you sure you're okay?"

"Are you? she asked, looking him in the eye.  
Are we?"

###

Matt Dillon fell like a great oak on the bed, his arms stretched out. The bruises on his face and side were throbbing, and he felt stiff.

"I'm getting too old for this," the big man sighed.  
He waited for her caustic reply. Silence.

Kitty quietly and slowly got out of her clothes.  
As Matt watched her he felt she was a million miles away.  
He knew what was wrong. Or thought he did. The babies. The happy family. He was afraid this might happen.  
With a grimace on his face Matt got up from the bed to stand behind her.

"You're my world, you know. Just you, Kitty. You're all I need."

She looked at her reflection in the floor length mirror. Over her shoulder, Matt's rugged face stared back at her. Such sadness in his blue eyes.

"I know how selfish I've been, Kitty. I always knew I couldn't give you the things you deserved. I'm so sorry."

Kitty just stood frozen, not saying anything, just staring at his reflection.

"I better leave," Matt murmured.

 

###

Matt began to dress. The silence in the room was deafening.

Then, without warning, Kitty broke from her trance and ran to the startled man, nearly knocking him over.

They held each other tight and Matt could feel her trembling against him.

"Forgive me, Matt, Kitty sobbed. Forgive me."

"What?"

Matt gently marshaled Kitty to the bed, and then sat beside her, stroking her hair and kissing her forehead.

"There's nothing to forgive, Kit, he whispered.  
I'm the one who should be sorry.  
I know today was a little overwhelming. It just reminded you of all the things I haven't done for you.  
It breaks my heart to know I've hurt you."

Kitty looked up at him, her face streaked with tears.  
"Stop, Matt!" she sobbed.

Matt didn't know what else to say. He held the fragile woman in his arms and pulled her gently down on the bed.

"Shhh.  
It's going to be all right. Just lie here and let me hold you.  
Shhh."

"Oh Matt," she mumbled, as she buried her face into his chest.

"You're so wonderful and that makes it so much harder. I love you so much."

"Honey, I don't understand."

"How could you think I resented you, Matt?"

"Well, I thought..  
By golly, Kitty, I'm just so confused right now."

You have to tell me what's wrong."

"Years ago when I told you I could never give you a child, you said that it was okay, and that we would make our own special life together."

"Sure. I remember. And we did, Kitty.  
But I know you deserve mo.."

"Will you stop that!" Kitty shouted as she pushed herself away from him.

Kitty curled up in a ball, and then drew her arms in tighter when Matt tried to open them to see her face.

The weary man sat up and propped his elbows on his knees, and then dropped his face into his hands.

"Oh, Kitty. Everything I say is wrong. I just make everything worse.

Tell me what to do. I'm trying so hard.

Please help me. Don't you know how much I love you?"

They stayed silently apart for several moments.  
Kitty finally unfolded herself, and then sat beside Matt.  
She put her head on his shoulder and rubbed his back.  
When he turned his face slightly toward her, she could see the tears.

"I used to think you were relieved," she whispered.

Her words hung in the air.  
Matt lifted his face from his hands, but kept his head down.  
When he finally spoke, it was also in a whisper.

"I was, Kitty.  
Forgive me, but when you told me I thought it was good. That it would be one less thing to worry about."

"But I saw you today, Matt. The way you were with Marie. What you said to her.

I can't give you the child you deserve."

"You give me everything I need, Kitty.  
You alone."

Kitty's tear-streaked face suddenly broke into a smile.  
She held Matt's bruised and swollen face in her hands, and finally he began to grin.

"Oh, look at us," Kitty snickered.

The lovers began a light kiss that became more and more impassioned as they fell back on the bed and playfully entwined their arms and legs together.

Suddenly they each began to giggle.  
Both recognized this as a common tension and stress reliever.

They continued to keep their lips together as the giggles grew into laughter, and they had to break their embrace to lay side by side until it subsided.

"Okay?" Matt finally asked.

"Yes. You?"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry you were so upset, Kitty.  
I only meant Dave was a lucky guy, not that I envied him.

I knew how hard it was for you to not have a child of your own, and I should have been more sensitive, not so selfish."

"You were right, Matt. For us it was for the best.  
I understand that. I just let the emotions take over.  
Your love. You alone, Matt. That's all I ever need."

"So does that mean I can actually get out of these clothes and stay a while?" Matt asked with an impish grin.

"Here, Kitty answered. Let me help you with that."

 

The End


End file.
